You Can Change Your Mind, But You Can't Change Your Destiny

I am sitting in the KIX airport, waiting to board my flight back to the states, trying come to grips with the last moments of my time in Japan. Should I be happy I'm going home, sad that I'm leaving my friends? Last night the last few I-House I people that remained wandered through the house, going in the rooms of those who had already left, telling stories and doing impressions. This morning they dragged themselves out of bed at the ungodly hour of 6:30 AM to bid me farewell, and in a haze I went through the flurry of movements necessary to end my stay at I-House, load my luggage into the airport shuttle, and say goodbye to everyone. It was over so quickly, only to leave me with what seemed like ages to reflect as the taxi slowly made its way to Osaka. I can still see everyone, waving goodbye in front of the house as we pulled away.

I find myself often thinking that my future is wide open. That there is precious little that can keep me from running off to India to teach English or rubbertramping around the United States or putting off real life in favor of another year of college. This vast and unfathomable uncertainty, while frightening in its own right, is reassuring when it comes to saying goodbye to people you care about. Just as I can never know for certain where I am headed next, nor can I rightfully say that I will never see the friends I have made here. Some day we will meet again. In Japan, or elsewhere.

There is no doubt in my mind. また、あの時。お世話になりました。

And on this note, I believe I will end my blog on my time in Japan. There are more things to share, I'm sure, and I know that if given the chance I could go on endlessly. But instead I will leave it simply. I will miss this country. There are things about it that are more reassuring than any other place on Earth. Even now, listening to people chat in English and having two American tourists rudely cut in front of me at a Starbuck's counter I feel unsettled. It will be nice to go home and see my friends and family, but I think it will take some readjusting. In the mean time, if you'd like to know more about my experiences, just ask. At the moment I have a Pacific ocean to cross.